Is Being Different a Bad Thing?

 In the novel, the topic of being the "typical Dominican man" occurs widely throughout. You were categorized as a great Dominican man if you had a way with women. Being someone who can easily attract women and sleep with them meant that you were "the man". In Oscar's case, he was Dominican, but not your average Dominican. He was once seen as "the man" when he formed a love triangle between two girls in his high school years. Once his heart was broken by one of them, his life began to change. Oscar began to gain weight and had a deep interest in the sci-fi genre. All he would like to do is stay in and write stories as opposed to be out getting women. All the other Dominican men felt Oscar was not Dominican and just excluded him out of that category. But why does it have to be that way? In my opinion, everyone has their differences. Oscar, to an extent, did have a part of his Dominican culture with the fact that he was crazed for woman but he also had his own personality and way of life, which in my opinion is perfectly fine. Every one should have something unique about them because, if not they would be categorized with other people and never have the chance to be their own person. I feel differences are a very good thing, as they are something that makes you special, something that can identify you from everyone else. Although Oscar was constantly criticized for who he was, I feel he stood his ground and continued to be the person he was. He knew what his interests were and stuck to them because he knew that those things were what he enjoyed. Often times people who are supposed to be in a certain category try to change who they are to be accepted by others. Like for example, when Yunior insisted that Oscar needed to change, Oscar did take it into consideration and began running with Yunior. But, this didn't really work for him and he went back to doing the same things he was used to. I feel that Oscar was made to be the way he was and couldn't change it because it was who he was destined to be. I feel people shouldn't have to change to fit in ,but should be accepted for who they are.

The Perfect Daughter?

In the novel, Lola describes what it is to be the "perfect daughter" within her Dominican culture. Basically, the perfect daughter is a slave for their mother, they cook, clean, and complete any other task their mother asks of them with no debate. From the family I come from, this too is something that contributes to being the perfect daughter. Not so much doing it all yourself, but helping around the house and just contributing, as opposed to depending on the adults of the household, does persuade your mother that you are trying your best and they will see you as the perfect daughter. But, there was one thing that I didn't agree so much with in Lola's story. I felt that the fact that her mother would constantly put her down and talked bad about her own daughter was very harsh and something that a mother should not do. In the novel Lola says, "For a long time I let her say what she wanted about me, and what was worse, for a long time I believed her. I was a fea, I was worthless, I was an idiota. From ages two to thirteen I believed her and because I believed her I was the perfect hija" (Diaz 56). This quote was very surprising to me when I read it because I just couldn't believe that a mother can talk so bad about there child to the point where their child would believe it. In my opinion a mother should always lift up their children, make them always feel good about themselves and always push them to be the best person they can be. In my own experience, my mother always pushes me to do better and when I know I am good at something she would tell me to work harder to be great. I actually felt really bad for Lola when reading her story because as a daughter myself I know that having a good mother is really important since they are the ones who you are supposed to look up to, they are the ones who are supposed to teach you all the things you need to know about being a woman. Lola then begins to rebel against her mother, cutting her hair, talking back, and even running away. I also thought this was wrong on Lola's part. I had a lot in common with Lola especially the fact that her mother was very ill. My mother is a very sick woman as well and I know that putting all of that extra stress on her would make her worse. I think Lola should have taken a different route and instead of rebelling, she should have tried to talk to her mother, telling her how she felt, and maybe even asking her to stop the negative commentary. In my opinion, it is a great way to tell someone of higher authority than yourself how you feel with out disrespecting them. All in all, I think Juno Diaz did a great job with Lola's story, it was very easy to empathize and I actually felt like I was in the story because of how well detailed it was and how much emotion was put into his writing.